I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize