Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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