I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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