i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
