i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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