You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I think I sprained my soul last night
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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