Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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