Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
