just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
