Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
