youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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