Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I think your dad took our porno
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
