need another drink. this is the easiest way
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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