this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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