You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so explain again why im purple
no
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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