ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize