Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
