it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
the raccoons are back...
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