shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
