But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
