After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
