I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
