So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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