It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
