I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Shame is for Republicans.
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