yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
