You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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