Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
