She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
