It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
