I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
