Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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