THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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