Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
