end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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