Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Randomize
