you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
