u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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