He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
