Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
