glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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