That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
