Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
