I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
