I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
