Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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