I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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