in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
