i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
His nipple licking is glorious
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