you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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