Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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